The idea of choosing adoptive parents for your baby might overwhelm you. Before you start looking at adoptive family profiles, it’s helpful to think about what you’re looking for in the family. Sometimes birth mothers choose a couple that’s similar to their family. They might even look for a family with an aspect that they often longed for growing up. Here, we’re going to share tips on how to pick an adoptive family.
Lifetime Adoption is here to help you in your search. We’ll mail you printed profiles about adoptive couples, which look like scrapbooked booklets. And, you can always view adoptive family profiles on our site. When you’re ready, Lifetime will put you in touch with your top picks. You can email, chat or call the family to have a conversation with them.
Here are 5 tips to help you as you look at adoptive families:
- Are you looking at an adoptive couple who have one (or more) adopted children, with open adoptions? Ask to speak to those children’s birth mothers, to see if the family kept their promises to keep in touch after the adoption.
- Take it slow; don’t rush yourself to choose. It’s better to make a decision that you’ve thought about deeply than to pick a family just because you’re getting towards the end of your pregnancy. Know that you can choose an adoptive family at any time, including after your baby is born.
- Discuss future contact, and be flexible. Try to find a family that is okay with being flexible based on your needs and your child’s needs. As you talk to them now, you might feel like one visit a year is enough. But after giving birth and going through with an adoption plan, one a year might not feel like enough. Or, you may find that you’re okay with just emailed updates and updates on Facebook. This is why choosing a family that is open to the possibility that contact might change is important.
- Talk with more than just one family. This is smart even if you’re in love with one particular couple; it lets you compare the two. It’s your right to speak with as many families as you need to.
- If you start to feel unsure whether the couple isn’t right for your child, speak up to your adoption coordinator. You’re not forced to go with that family, and your coordinator can send you additional adoptive family profiles if needed.
Can we help you with your thoughts about choosing adoptive parents? Lifetime Adoption is here to answer any questions or concerns you may have; just call us at 1-800-923-6794 or send us an email.
As the Chief Operating Officer (COO) of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.
Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.
As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.