After your adoption plan for your baby or child happens, you’ll probably be going through lots of emotions. Add to that, the post-partum soreness, and you may be going through a pretty intense time. Here are 4 simple things that can help with what you’re going through:
- Encouragement and Support
Your family might not support that you gave your child up for adoption, but there are other people who can give you support. It might be another birth mom, it might be your friends, or it may be a counselor. At Lifetime, we’re here to support you not only during but after your adoption plan. We can also hook you up with a peer counselor: a woman who’s also made an adoption plan and can relate to what you’re going through.
Care and support are two of the most important parts of making it out of the dark place you may be in after placement. If you don’t have your parent’s support, move in with a friend or have a friend stay with you. By having someone to talk to, it’ll help with the possible postpartum depression that could happen on top of the sadness you already feel.
- Pain Meds
Post-delivery, your uterus tries to get back to its original size so there’s going to be cramping. Your doctor will prescribe pain medication before you check out of the hospital. It’s important to take them as prescribed for the first few days. Handling all the emotions you’ll have post-placement will take up a lot of your energy, so avoiding as many of the afterpains of labor is crucial.
Keep the photos you took during your hospital stay to look at during this time. If you have an open adoption plan, the adoptive couple should share photos they took. The adoptive family may also give you a small gift or keepsake. Displaying those where you can see them may help.
- Thinking Towards the Future
During this time, it’s important to get out and leave the house. That way, you can get some fresh air and think about other things. There’s nothing wrong with thinking about your child, but be sure you’re not obsessing on it because that could cause severe depression.
Do something just for you: it may be getting a pedicure, massage, or having a girl’s night. Activities like these will help in getting you back into life.
It’ll also help to dream and plan about your future. You deserve the chance for a future after adoption, just as you’ve ensured a bright healthy future for your child. There’s a scholarship set aside just for birth mothers; learn more at LifetimeFoundation.org.
While you can’t totally prevent the sadness and pain that comes after placing your child for adoption, these things will definitely help. The top thing you’ll need post-placement is support; know that Lifetime is here for you. You can speak with an adoption coordinator, another birth mom, or a counselor.
Just give us a call at 1-800-923-6784
As Vice President of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.
Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.
As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.