Question: What is the best way to figure out what kind of parent I would be? I’m confused and really want to make the right decision.
Answer: It’s very normal to think about what kind of parent you would be. Here are some things to think about that will bring you closer to the best solution and decision:
- Are you able to support yourself and a baby on your own?
- Is the father of the baby responsible? Can he help with expenses until the child is 18? Is he able to support himself? Is he emotionally ready to be a father at this time?
- What takes up most of your time now, school or work? What adjustments would you need to make if you had a child?
- Do you have a supportive family that has a track record of helping you and being there for you and a child?
- Do your parents and friends follow through with what they say? Do you feel they will flake out or commit to helping long term?
- Are you able to support a child with feeding, clothing, education, child care, transportation, medical and dental care etc?
- Do you feel you can give your child the kind of life he or she deserves and the life you want for them?
- Are you ready to give up a lifestyle as a young single woman to being a mom with responsibilities to your baby?
Being honest with yourself shows maturity and takes courage. The answers will help you make the best, focused decision on what is best for you and your child without guilt.
Maybe you would like to speak to another woman that chose adoption for support. If you don’t know if you are ready to be a parent or can’t decide, there are counselors that are easy to talk to that are neutral and don’t pressure you, but help you sound out the many thoughts and feelings you are having.
Call Lifetime’s adoption hotline free of charge at 1-800-923-6784 to request info. You deserve to feel you have explored the best you can all the options including parenting and adoption. Hear directly from women on why they chose adoption by visiting our Adoption Stories page.
As the Chief Operating Officer (COO) of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.
Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.
As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.