Birth parents sometimes worry that adoptive parents won’t let them have contact after adoption if they want it. This is where a post adoption contact agreement can be important. In some states, adoptive parents and birth parents sign this agreement and it is filed with the adoption and becomes a legal, enforceable part of the adoption. However, in other states, it isn’t recognized as a legally binding contract. But Lifetime Adoption supports these agreements, especially if it is in the best interest of everyone involved.
The best way to truly ensure you have an open adoption, whether or not your state enforces a post adoption contact agreement is to build and develop a relationship with the adoptive parents you choose.
Getting to know them before the adoption and having an open conversation about what you want for future contact will be the basis for a good relationship in the future. That conversation is also an easy way to express your expectations and learn about theirs. For example, if you are open to visits and the adoptive parents want just to share annual updates via email, it may not be a good match.
There needs to be an agreement and meeting of the minds (and hearts!) before the adoption, or any post adoption contact agreement, whether enforceable or not, is simply not going to work the way you expect it to.
Being Honest With Your Adoption Professional About Post Adoption Contact
It would be best if you were open and honest with your adoption professional about this too. At Lifetime Adoption, we believe strongly in open adoption. Additionally, this means that the expecting mother is able to talk about the type of contact she wants.
All Lifetime families are ready and eager to have an open adoption with you. Also, with Lifetime, you can choose ways to keep in touch like:
- Letters and pictures
- Texting
- In-person visits
- Connecting via social media
- Phone calls
- And more!
Lifetime Adoption’s Post Adoption Contact Agreement Sample
Your Lifetime coordinator will make sure that you and the adoptive parents are all on the same page. She will help you with a post adoption contact agreement if you choose. Then, both you and the adoptive parents will sign it. Also, Lifetime will be here for you if you need help getting updates or making changes to your hopes for future contact. Here is our post adoption contact agreement sample.
At the heart of open adoption is what is best for the child, and studies have shown that being upfront about the contact and the adoption story is definitely best for most children. Adopted children who know who their birth parents are and why they were placed for adoption tend to have higher self-esteem and a sense of identity.
We believe that a birth mother should know that her child is happy, healthy, and living the life she hoped they would live. That’s why Lifetime values the connection of open adoption. And we will ensure that you have the opportunity to receive the future contact you wish.
Get Started with a Lifetime Adoption
Call or text Lifetime today at 1-800-923-6784.
As Vice President of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.
Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.
As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.
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