Last Monday, I shared with you a few signs you’re ready to turn to adoption. Today’s post is part two in my two-part series on deciding when the time has come to turn from fertility treatments to adoption.
Here are two more signs that it might be time to think about considering adoption:
- You, your spouse, or your doctor feel like it’s not going to happen.
Is there a feeling of lost hope? Sometimes, fertility treatments can be like a self-fulfilling prophecy: if you believe it’s not going to happen, your body believes that. When you’ve lost faith and hope that fertility treatments will work, you may be affecting your outcome. Fertility treatments make your life feel as if it’s out of your control, and they can also put a strain on your relationship. If you get to the point that you hate everything about the fertility treatments, maybe it’s time to take a break and explore adoption. And, when your doctor expresses doubt that a couple will get pregnant, it may be the final straw.
- You’re concerned about money.
In-vitro fertility treatments range from $10,000 to $14,000 or more; they’re definitely not cheap. Many couples have found they have to take a second mortgage out on their home and skip vacations in order continue fertility treatments. It’s better to plan ahead than to get to the end of fertility treatments and be deep in debt then turn to infant adoption only to discover it’s not free.
It’s important to understand that considering adoption doesn’t mean you’re giving up on having a biological child. It simply means that you want to become a mom now, rather than continuing to wait until fertility treatments are successful. Many couples adopt, and later experience the joy of being pregnant, either with or without medical intervention.
You can discover more about infant adoption by reading and hearing adoptive couples’ stories. These stories allow you to learn about open adoption and what families experienced during their open adoption journey. Sign up for a free webinar series of open adoption stories.
Founder of Lifetime Adoption, adoptive mom, adoption expert, and Certified Open Adoption Practitioner (C.O.A.P).
Since 1986, adoption expert Mardie Caldwell has been dedicated to bringing couples and birth parents together in order to fulfill their dreams.
“Many years ago, I was also searching for a child to adopt. We didn’t know where or how to get started. Through research, determination, and a prayer, our dream of a family became reality. I started with a plan, a notebook, assistance from a caring adoption consultant and a lot of hard work; this was my family I was building. We had a few heartaches along the way, but the pain of not having children was worse!
Within weeks we had three different birth mothers choose us. We were overwhelmed and delighted. Many unsettling events would take place before our adoption would be finalized, many months later. Little did I know that God was training and aligning me for the adoption work I now do today. It is my goal to share with our families the methods and plans which succeed and do not succeed. I believe adoption should be affordable and can be a wonderful “pregnancy” for the adoptive couple.
I have also been on both sides of infertility with the loss of seven pregnancies and then conceiving by new technology, giving birth to a healthy daughter. I have experienced first-hand the emotional pain of infertility and believe my experience allows me to serve your needs better.
It is my hope that for you, the prospective parents, your desire for a child will be fulfilled soon.”