What to Know About Putting Kids Up for Adoption Together

by | Mar 13, 2020 | Birth Parent Blog

Mother at a water park, thinking about adoption for her two children“Can I put both my children up for adoption?

Are there couples who would take more than one child?”

Whether it’s behavioral issues, a lack of support, or worries about your finances that brought you to this blog, know that Lifetime is here to help. It’s common to feel helpless sometimes as a parent. When you’re facing a crisis, adoption may seem the best option for your children to have a better life.

Let’s say that you just learned you are having twins (or even triplets!) Or maybe you already have a child, and suddenly you discover that you are pregnant again. If this sounds like your situation, you might want to know that there are couples out there who would be willing to take on more than one child at once.

There are actually adoptive families that would be eager to take on more than one child at a time. While most of Lifetime’s adoptive couples are seeking a newborn adoption, it is possible to place both of your children with the same family. In fact, it may be more common than you think.

Why Do Mothers Place Their Children for Adoption?

You might feel that placing multiple children for adoption is the best step to take. Life is unpredictable, and you could find yourself giving birth to multiples, like twins or triplets. You could also give birth and then realize that you are already struggling with your other child or children. You might decide that placing a child for adoption is the best way to take care of them.

If you’re thinking about adoption for your children, please make sure these are not temporary difficulties or just fleeting thoughts. Depression, anxiety and many other factors might make you feel like parenting is impossible. It’s a common thought for parents everywhere. In many cases, it is only a tough patch in life. Since adoption is a life-changing decision, it’s important to be 100% sure that it’s the best choice for you and for your children. Try asking yourself a few key questions first, like whether there are resources which would help you parent.

Why Do Some Families Want to Adopt Multiple Children?

Some couples are beyond happy to adopt more than one child at once, also called a “sibling group adoption.” In fact, some might even prefer it. Each hopeful adoptive family with Lifetime has already thought about the possibilities of a sibling group adoption before moving forward with adoption. You can rest assured that each of the adoptive couples who are open to adopting a sibling group is safe, loving, and completely ready and excited to become parents!

One major reason why couples are so happy to adopt multiple children is so they can reach their desired family size quickly. A couple may already know that they want to have two children, and they might decide that a sibling group adoption is the best option.

Some families also like to adopt several children at once so that they all adjust at the same time. This means that each child will be able to adapt to the environment together, which provides a built-in support system. Adoption can be an expensive process for an adoptive family, and the couple may decide it only wants to go through the process once.

Can You Choose the Same Family More than Once?

In some cases, a birth mother places one child with a family and finds herself pregnant again in the future. She may want to choose the same family for placement for her second child. If you are in this situation, it is possible for you to choose the same family. You may need to speak with the adoption professional who helped you with the first adoption to see if the family is still interested in adoption. Many families will welcome this situation with open arms.

Why Should I Place My Children With One Adoptive Family?

children-adoption2You might be wondering whether siblings will get separated when choosing adoption. Research shows says that it’s crucial to keep the sibling connection through adoption. It’s incredibly important for your children to stay together, and be placed with one adoptive couple if at all possible.

There are several advantages for the siblings when a family adopts several children at once. In fact, most adoption professionals recommend keeping biological siblings together when possible.

First, placing more than one child at once provides your children with siblings that they can form a strong relationship with. These children form emotional attachments to each other. Maintaining sibling groups for adoption will help your children cope with the transition to another family. Since a sibling is someone who you can trust and relate to, this is a vital relationship to maintain during the adoption process.

When children from the same family come into a home, it can also solidify their cultural background and help children establish a strong bond with their roots. They can identify with each other.

Should You Consider a Family Who Wants to Adopt Multiple Children?

There are many reasons to consider placing your children together with the same family. For example, you might have two children with medical needs or developmental delays. You may not be in the best position to care for both children.

You may also find that siblings placed together benefit in terms of mental health and personal relationships. Many siblings who are placed together do not have many of the same questions about their family history that others do.

How Lifetime Can Help You

If you want to make an adoption plan for your newborn along with his or her sibling(s), Lifetime Adoption will not split the children up. Many loving adoptive parents are open to answering the need for a sibling group adoption. If you choose Lifetime Adoption to make an adoption plan for your children, you will maintain control over the adoption process. Just as you can with a newborn adoption plan, you’re able to choose the adoptive family who you think will be the best fit. We can connect you with a licensed third-party counselor to help you talk through what you’re feeling right now. Also, you can decide on the level of openness you’d like in your adoption, including how much contact you maintain after the adoption takes place. You’ll receive respect from everyone involved.

As the children’s mother, you’re in the driver’s seat of the adoption process. We understand that this process isn’t easy since there will be significant emotional challenges. This transition may be difficult for both you and your children.

Ultimately, the choice is yours. You have a difficult decision to make, but you can rest assured knowing that Lifetime is here to give you the resources you need to make the best decision for your children.

If you’re considering placing your children for adoption, you can call Lifetime and speak with an adoption coordinator to go over all of your options. Just call or text us at 1-800-923-6784. We’re not here to talk you into adoption, but to find out what is best for you and your kids.

Heather Featherston

Written by Heather Featherston

As Vice President of Lifetime Adoption, Heather Featherston holds an MBA and is passionate about working with those facing adoption, pregnancy, and parenting issues. Heather has conducted training for birth parent advocates, spoken to professional groups, and has appeared on television and radio to discuss the multiple aspects of adoption. She has provided one-on-one support to women and hopeful adoptive parents working through adoption decisions.

Since 2002, she has been helping pregnant women and others in crisis to learn more about adoption. Heather also trains and speaks nationwide to pregnancy clinics to effectively meet the needs of women who want to explore adoption for their child. Today, she continues to address the concerns women have about adoption and supports the needs of women who choose adoption for their child.

As a published author of the book Called to Adoption, Featherston loves to see God’s hand at work every day as she helps children and families come together through adoption.

Read more about Heather Featherston

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